She once said to me— “some people are broken, they can never be fixed, and should just be put down.”  I bristled, but my cynical side betrayed me by agreeing. I know plenty of people who are unwilling to heal. 

It went unsaid that she is the best example of this. Her trauma has turned acidic in her veins. Her anger, her deep pain, informs her every breathe. She builds relationships based on manipulation, bitterness, hatred, a desperate need for control; she is truly toxic. 

I wonder if she knows this about herself and that is why her opinion of these ‘broken’ people is so strong. Or perhaps that knowledge is tucked away in that deep, buried place where she hides the darkest part of her history. Not really aware at all, but enough a part of her that it fuels a desperate need to articulate these descriptions in a futile attempt to convince the world, herself, that she is separate. She is not one of them.